There are three steps. Easy peasy, right? Three things you can do to have healthier friendships, because those relationships are your anchor- they keep you grounded when the winds and waves of life threaten to rip you off course.
As women we need connection to others. It’s how we grow, gain support, express our creativity, emerge as goddesses, and embrace our own vulnerabilities. Without friendships, life is isolating, and our spirits shrink and dim.
Read MoreWhy does the word selfish get such a bum rap?
Why is it undesirable or even considered a bit ugly to think about yourself? Your feelings, wants, and desires? How else are you going to know what you really want your life to be?
I’ve redefined selfish.
Read MoreDo you ever so this?
Spiral yourself into a tizzy, because you’re feeling insecure, unsafe or imagining that all the monsters lurking under the bed are going to slink out and swallow you up?
We all have triggers. Those thoughts that cause us to feel panicky, queasy, and anxious. They usually appear when we’re trying to control every aspect of our life and failing miserably: We need money, our child is struggling, our job is sucking the life out of us, the love we want is absent or being withheld.
Read MoreEvery time you utter these three words, you’re telling the world that you don’t matter.
That they’re wasting time on you.
That your wants, desires, and dreams are unimportant.
It’s self sabotage and it’s time to put a stop to it.
Read MoreGiven my newfound knowledge, that I must love me first and best, I’m doing and experiment. Instead of concentrating on a new romantic relationship, I’m focusing on bring more love into my life.
Read MoreA few small words.
Small because they’re petty and mean.
Small because that’s how they make your feel.
Small because you can easily fit them into your heart, even if there’s no room for their destructive nature.
Small is how I felt.
Read MoreThe Disease to Please.
Maybe you’re a victim too? Its tentacles grasping at your values, boundaries, and authenticity? Trying to keep you stuck in place, where everyone else’s needs overshadow your own until you end up living a life where your wants, desires and dreams are just wisps of memory?
The new year began with hopes, goals, dreams and a heaping helping of determination,
It lasted…all of 5 days. I’m not proud of my collapse of will power, but I’m understanding my own self imposed limits, because that’s what they are, limits that I’ve welcomed in and made cozy on the sofa of my psyche-complete with the cushy pillow and fringed throw.
Why did I fail so quickly and why wasn’t I surprised?
Read MoreIt’s empowering to shout out that you aren’t in bondage to someone else definition of you. Forgiveness gives you the strength to reclaim all the parts of yourself. It’s about letting go of the hurt and keeping the lesson, which is where you grew stronger and learned your own power.
Read MoreAs I bent down to scoop up Perri’s latest deposit into a baggie, I thought about how much time I spend carrying a baggie of poo around. Hmmm. Twice a day times over 300 days a year. Yikes! That’s a lot of baggies.
From there my little brain thought about how much time I spend carrying around other people’s little baggies. You know- their unsolicited opinions, negativity, drama.
Read MoreI’m not ready to let it go, it’s still too fresh. But I’m ready to let go of my frustration with myself, the expectation that I had to do something I wasn’t ready for. I could easily throw away the feelings of inadequacy, guilt, and shame.
Read MoreIf you’re like me, you don’t always directly ask for what you want. You may hint around the edges, but never really look your desire straight in the face and say, “I choose you.” It’s as if there’s some unwritten rule or misguided assumption that to ask for what you truly want is just not done or even a bit selfish.
Read MoreI’ve noticed that the more I try to be open to new love, the more I get pulled into thoughts about old ones.
It’s like people from your past haunt you.
The experiences (good and bad) replay over again on a loop in your mind, making you feel stuck and grinding to a halt the chance to start over. It doesn’t have to be an old lover. You can replay betrayals, hurts, and emotional pain caused by a former friend, boss, or family member. The damage sticks with you over a lifetime unless you choose to let it go.
Is there an area is your life that’s missing the mark…a bit off target from what you want?
What message are you secretly telling others about your expectations related to your relationships, your worth, your career?
Once you know your secret vibe, then take action to soften its pulse.
Read MoreYou are depleted.
You feel stripped away of your verve, your energy, your spark.
You may feel worthless and try with all your might to continue at breakneck speed, but you body, mind and spirit have slammed on the breaks and you come to a screeching halt.
This isn’t a bad thing.
It’s your soul telling you it’s time to rest, reflect and replenish.
Read MoreThe thing about being a slacker is that it's necessary.
Life is wound up with deadlines and expectations. A break from the chaos doesn't mean you're irresponsible, it means you're smart.
Usually I try to jolly myself out of ‘this life is sucky’ place, but as I mowed my lawn, I decided to stop and stay for a while. I gave myself permission to wallow. I gave it to the pity party and since it was my party – I cried because I wanted to.
So, I’ve decided to take a lesson from my dog.
She has that one “go to” person whom she can trust and lean on. Perri doesn’t have to pretend not to be someone else, she asks for what she needs, and she’s abundantly grateful for all the care she receives. Perri’s willing to expose her soft belly believing that she will be rewarded with a lovely scratch.
Read More
Intuitively, you know that your anger doesn’t serve you or anyone else. But if it’s been hanging around for a while, it may be hard to detach, like a two year old clinging to her mom’s leg. So how do you let your anger go- as in see you later, Sayonara, hit the road jack?
Conflict makes me a bit edgy or itchy, like wearing the red wool sweater that looked great in the store but gives me hives. I know I must be an adult and face it head on, but I’d rather hide in the closet under my stairs eating graham crackers (my comfort food), trying to be invisible, so it would all just go away.
So how do you deal with people who push your buttons? They make you feel angry or sad or guilty.
