In the journey of every woman, there comes a time when she feels stuck. It’s inertia couple with fear. A sense that you’ll be stuck in place, experiencing the same feelings over and over again, and you can’t see an escape route. You’re immobilized, a bit panicky, and just want it all to go away.
Read MoreIt’s been 10 months.
That’s a long time.
I miss warm hugs, not having to worry if my mask is with me, and meeting friends for coffee – where I want and when I want.
I’m tired of hearing the fear in my mom’s voice, sitting in my home office chair for hours on end, and talking about the virus.
I’m sick of the frigging pandemic. But I’m not going to let it steal from me. I’m not going to let it define my any piece of my life. Yes- I want it done and gone, but I know it will leave an imprint.
Here’s my list of things COVID-19 can’t steal away from me.
Read MoreNo one likes to think of themselves as a grown up, we all still want to be that little girl, who found solace and love with her blanket. But we do grow up and the world around us is still uncertain and a bit un-nerving.
Read MoreI was thinking about this yesterday as Perri and crunched down our path, the leaves beneath our feet. Why the Pig? What is it about the Pig that draws everyone in?
I believe it’s because we all relate to the Pig.
Read MoreThe funny thing about triggers is that we never know when one might set us off, but we certainly know when we’ve been triggered. There’s a frustration and helplessness as a more basic instinctual response rises up. And we’re left reeling from a flood of lower emotions that leave us feeling disoriented, ashamed, and extremely vulnerable.
A trigger is the Universe’s way of telling us we have an unhealed story.
Read MoreAfter the accident, I felt like I was stuck, missing my purpose, and that there was something more I was destined to accomplish in my time on this big, beautiful planet. I spent two years, trying to find my way to the surface, feeling overwhelmed, fearful, and not recognizing my life.
What I didn’t know at the time, was that all the discomfort was a result of my own spiritual growth. My skin felt itchy, like it didn’t fit any more. Which was true. I’d outgrown some old beliefs and was struggling to figure out my new way of living.
Read MoreThere are times when we simply feel adrift, the unknown so overwhelming that we seek the familiar, people and things that makes us feel safe, secure and supported. Just by their presence, we once again feel anchored and rooted.
Read MoreI needed to feel safe. I needed to breathe. I needed to set back the clock five minutes, so I could once again be ignorant, clueless, and blissful.
Vulnerability sucks. There’s an exposure that is so personal, like your insides are set out in front of others for them to pick through, discarding the parts that are unworthy.
Read MoreI’m exhausted and I feel just off, like I’m here, but I’m not. Everything is muted and my capacity to feel is diminished, like a thin shadow has settled over me, stifling my senses.
Yesterday, I was chatting with a friend about how she’s managing during the pandemic and heard my feelings echoed in her words. She wasn’t feeling quite herself; her moods would shift quickly, and she felt like she’s been walking in quicksand. And she’s not the only one. So many of my friends have been experiencing lethargy, sadness, tiredness, and a general sense of malaise.
That’s when the lightbulb came on, and just like in a cartoon, I felt the little pop above my head and I thought ‘a-ha.’
It’s grief.
Read MoreA boiling pot of gunk. Rumbling and noxious. Every changing from moment to moment.
My emotions are all over the place from disbelief, to overwhelm, to a deeper grief.
All due to the COVID-19 and social distancing.
So many people are overwhelmed with fear.
I’ve talked with friends, family, co-workers, and even the Walmart stocker. (more about him in a minute) Everyone is struggling, whether they publicly admit or not.
It’s okay.
It’s okay to be scared, angry, frustrated, and lonely. Please don’t judge yourself or anyone else for their response to this crisis.
Read MoreDo you ever so this?
Spiral yourself into a tizzy, because you’re feeling insecure, unsafe or imagining that all the monsters lurking under the bed are going to slink out and swallow you up?
We all have triggers. Those thoughts that cause us to feel panicky, queasy, and anxious. They usually appear when we’re trying to control every aspect of our life and failing miserably: We need money, our child is struggling, our job is sucking the life out of us, the love we want is absent or being withheld.
Read MoreI stood in the bright, dazzling Florida sunshine. Feeling the heat on my shoulders and instead of feeling relaxed, soothed, and in my zone -I was petrified. I felt trapped and my stomach roiled, the taste in my mouth like acid.
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