When you've just had enough
You’ve given your all.
That’s the mantra many have for life. The ‘you only live once’ attitude or the full commitment to making work lifestyle. Going full throttle every moment of every day.
Sometimes this choice is yours. You’re chasing the dream of being launching your own clothing line, owning that beach house with the sweet covered porch, or getting that job that makes you feel like an almighty goddess.
Sometimes life makes the choice for you. Your marriage of 20 years implodes, your dad is diagnosed with terminal cancer, your teen is in rehab for a meth addiction.
Regardless of the circumstances you find the strength to make it all work. You dig so deep to find that very last ounce of energy to fold the mile high pile of laundry, smile when a friend asks how you are, or be a rock for others whose pain is like your own.
Then one day you hit the proverbial wall. There is nothing left to give, just an emptiness that is both a refuge and a reminder that you need to be doing something, but you can’t hall you bum your oh so comfy couch.
Depleted.
You are depleted.
You feel stripped away of your verve, your energy, your spark.
You may feel worthless and try with all your might to continue at breakneck speed, but you body, mind and spirit have slammed on the breaks and you come to a screeching halt.
This isn’t a bad thing.
It’s your soul telling you it’s time to rest, reflect and replenish.
No one, even super warrior goddesses like you can maintain a high vibe, almost manic lifestyle forever. Once you’ve nailed it and the job is yours or when you dad finally rests with the Divine in peace, all that energy whooshes out, like water circling a drain, and it’s time to rest.
You need to take the time to process all that has happened and prepare for what’s next in your life. Take the time to nourish yourself and rest. Set aside that ever present to do list and instead retreat from life for a while. Nap, read, meditate, or even cook a lavish meal that is full of your favorite comfort foods. Slow down and let your body recover from the staggering amounts of adrenalin that has been flooding your system.
Once you’ve calmed you body, focus on your thoughts. Reflect on your achievement, the change in your life, or the loss you’re facing. Get a journal, talk with a friend, snuggle your bum into your meditation cushion. Explore the lessons you learned, peel away the layers and explore what you would’ve done differently and celebrate those moments where you rocked it. Every experience we have is a lesson and every person we meet a teacher. Sometimes the lessons are good for you and other times they cut you to the very core. Lean into your reflection because from the experience you’ve learned what’s needed to live your life more fully.
Replenish and ground yourself. After you’ve rested and reflected, it’s time to suck energy back into your life in a gentle, loving way. Not the Red Bull, highly caffeinated route, but a more sustainable approach. Engage with people, places and activities that leave you feeling strong, centered and supported.
Who is that one friend whose company makes you feel all warm, cozy and bubbly inside? Her presence is a gift and when you leave, your first though is “wow- I feel great?” She build’s you up and listens with an ease of intensity. You feel treasured. Call her up and book a time to chat, go for a walk or have coffee. Don’t be just a taker of her great nature but share with your feelings and honor the friendship by saying how much she means to you.
Go to the place where you feel most alive. A sacred space for you where the connection to nature, the Divine and yourself is so easy. It could be a chapel, a favorite tree, a spot by the dancing little stream or even your bathtub. Go there and take a moment to breathe it in and be grateful this spot is available to you whenever you need it.
Re-engage in an activity that’s your zen. You know, where you lose track of time and your mind clears and clarity sweep in. Yoga, meditation, an art project, gardening, hiking all do it for me. Stay away from television, social media and the internet that can imprint negative vibes, focus instead on activities that engage your whole self.
Depletion occurs when your soul has just had enough and is telling you it’s time to refocus. It’s an opportunity to level up in your life by taking the time to reflect on what is happening in your life and how you can take any lesson and use them to engage more fully in your life and the greater world. Instead of being frustrated because your feeling like a limp dish rag, take the time to rest, reflect and replenish and you’ll find that your depletion will rebound more quickly.