3 powerful steps to silence your inner critic

And the Oscar goes to Kirstin, for having the most active and loudest inner critic. (cue applause)

Announcer: Never have we seen a more realistic portrayal of a woman riddled with self-doubt.  You could really feel here hesitancy, fear, and constant questioning of her worth.  Truly a performance of this Academy Award.

Okay- so that may be a bit dramatic.

But…there’s some the unbridled truth in it.

My inner critic becomes my constant companion when I’m on the verge of taking a new and positive step in my life.  She shouts things like, “You’re not worthy.  Who do you think you are to want this?  You’re never going to make that happen, so give up now sucker.”  Yeah- my inner critic can be a bit of a mean girl.

She also likes to give me a good flogging when I’m already feeling down.  She reinforces all the ugly things I secretly think about myself until they start playing on a loop in my head.

I so just want her to shut her pie hole!

And if you’re a human being, she’s been your companion at some time.  However, the inner critic, she’s not you.  She’s not who you are at your inner most core.  She’s your fear rearing her head to keep you stuck in place, a way to play it safe, to not take a chance to grow and discover your strength and wisdom.

Instead, you and I, we need to hear the loving, gentle voice of our soul.  The one that whispers to our hearts that we’re deserving of love, abundance, and happiness.  She’s the DJ I want spinning the record in my head.  And if she sounds like Air Supply, even better!

I’ve been working on hearing my soul voice, because carrying around my inner critic became heavy and burdensome.  I didn’t want to feel weighed down anymore, having my self-doubt prevent me from taking a chance on a new love or starting my new career as life coach.  I wanted to not only know I was worthy of having an amazing life, but I wanted to feel worthy too.

My default question became why not me?

If my friend can find a guy who makes her feel like a queen, why can’t I?

If the podcaster I follow can create a six figure digital course, why can’t I?

If my friend takes an amazing trip to Portugal, why can’t I?

The only thing preventing me from not having these things…was me.

It was time to take the journey from self-doubt to self worth.

And baby, it was a bumpy ride. But I learned a few things, and I want to share with you, so you can begin your journey and shut up that inner critic within you.

First, there is unending stream of abundance.  The things you want are there – ready and waiting for you.

What I mean is this; the success of my friend doesn’t mean I can’t have success.  It’s not a quid pro quo situation.  Everyone has access to happiness, abundance, opportunities, and love.  We just need to be open and allow ourselves to access it. 

It’s a mindset shift from lack to abundance. 

Think of it this way. You’ve been wanting to take a trip to Ireland to see the lush hills and hear that lilting accent, but you’re stuck thinking you can’t because you don’t have the time or the money. And then bam!  Your best friend calls and says she just booked her dream vacation and begins to tell you all about it in excruciating detail.  And as you listen, your heart sinks and you think, “wow she’s so lucky, I wish I could take my dream trip., but I just can’t swing it.”

You’re focusing on what’s lacking in your life, when the Universe just sent you a sign that you can do the same thing.  When good things happen around us, the Universe is showing you that you can get the same fabulous stuff, if you shift your mindset.  So instead of being jealous of your girlfriend, be happy for her.  Ask questions, help her plan, see her 200 pictures with real enthusiasm, not disgruntled reluctance.  Then take this amazing energy and say to yourself, “Yes- I can make this happen- It’s available to me!”

When you open yourself up to the possibility, that’s when things happen.  The money comes in, you find a home exchange opportunity, you bump into the guy, who makes your toes curl.

Second, don’t sell yourself short.  You have some mighty powerful gifts to share with the world. 

There’s no one in the world that is you.  You were born as a one-of-a-kind original.  So, comparing yourself to others is never a good idea.  Why?  Because you may be like a songbird and the person, you’re trying to stack yourself up against is a butterfly.  Each of you adds value to the world, but in different and equally wonderful ways.  Embrace your authenticity, dig deep into who you are because the gifts you have to offer are already a part of you.

Lastly, trust yourself.

Yeah, that one’s a doozy.  Building trust with yourself is the foundation of living a fulfilling and purposeful life.  You begin by listening to your soul voice and putting a sock in the mouth of your inner critic.  Every time you hear that scratchy, whiney voice in your head, simply say “I hear you.  Thanks for the feedback, but I got this from here.”  And then take a few minutes to tune inward through prayer, meditation, or journaling.  Ask yourself what you need to know to make the best choice and move forward.  The guidance is always there for you.

Your soul voice will always lead you to your highest good.  And once you make a habit of tuning in, you’ll discover that your life becomes easier, because you’re in alignment with who you truly are, and you can trust that you’ll receive what you need and make the decisions that are best for you.  Poof! Buh-bye self doubt and don’t let the door hit you in the backside.

I’m up for another Academy award.  I hope you tune in because next time the Announcer is going to say…

“And the Oscar goes to Kirstin, for her portrayal of a woman brimming with confidence and self esteem.”

…oh wait…I wasn’t acting.