The first step to knowing your self worth

Just sitting here getting ready to write about this subject brings up all sorts of...internal chaos. Bubbling self doubt and itchy skin. 

Most of us struggle with self worth.  The need to be valued, appreciated, and acknowledged for just being who we truly are....deep down.  The true self that appears when we sing in the shower, dance with inhibition in the kitchen to our favorite song or lie on the floor grieving the loss of someone special. 

Vulnerability is scary stuff.  It also the source of true connection; an opportunity to forge a bond with another in an inexplicable way.   Vulnerability is a gift, we give to ourselves and others, but one I don't share very often. Opening up..that just makes me want turn around and run.  Although I'm getting better...in self worth recovery.

The need to feel valued from others is tied in a tight little knot with our sense of self worth.  In order to receive, we must feel we are worthy of receiving and be vulnerable to admitting we don't have all the resources, answers, etc.

Ughh...chaos still churning away.

To move from "I don't feel worthy" to "I am worthy" is not simply a one time decision, but a daily one.  Each day we must embrace our own greatness, opening our arms as wide as we can to welcome in the abundance of love available to us.  But how?

I have read more books than I care to admit on this subject, but my greatest revelation happened when working with a coaching client.  This nugget has helped be begin to remove the armor around me and let a bit of vulnerability ooze out.

When someone offers you something...Take It!

Easy?  Not for a person who believes she can take care of everything herself. Not as first.  But consistency makes it better. 

If someone offers to help you...say yes.

If someone offer you a compliment...say thank you.

If someone offers to pay for your coffee, do the dishes, shovel your walk, etc...don't dismiss them.  Say "Yes, Thank You!"

I realized that when someone else offers to help me, they're saying through their action that I have value to them. 

By saying no, or brushing off the compliment, we turn away a gift- acknowledgement of how

much we mean to them.  Not only that, but we are not adding to their sense of self worth.  It feels good to give...let others feel good.

By accepting and receiving, we open ourselves up to receive more, and give more.  This action of increased receiving and giving polishes our perception of our own value, until it shines.  Like a diamond.

Originally Published 12-20-2017