Say no and gain more

I used to be super mom. I swear the hero costume fit like a glove, highlighting my assets: organized, committed, enthusiastic, and my personal favorite...ugh...reliable.

Need help with... (insert every school, dance, church or friend activity you can imagine)...Yes, I will do it! You can count on me! Let me make your life so much easier! Here I am to save the day!

Until the day I realized my cape was tattered. I limped towards every project or tall building, battered and my energy drained . Feeling beaten and useless.

The word "Yes" was my nemesis.

Today the gracious "No" is my best friend.

I realized that with every YES, I was actually saying NO to all the things I truly wanted to do; the things that aligned with my values and made my heart sing.

While I was busy making everyone else a priority, me and my family were not. 

Ouch. Super mom meet super dud.

I began to take stock of my life.  Each new request carefully considered.  My default question became:

“if I say Yes to this request, what in my life, that I love, am I saying No to?”

( or think of it this way- if I say No to this request, what am I saying Yes to that is important to me?)

Today, I say Yes, but I now weigh it against my personal values and whether the yes provides value to me!

Are you giving all the good parts of yourself away? Feeling depleted or run ragged? Then perhaps the gracious No, should be invited to move into your life.

Originally Published 10-04-2017